Phoenix
The theme of Ashes is death and rebirth, a phoenix of new life rising from the ashes of what once was. Seems appropriate right now, doesn’t it? Clandestine Laboratories has been shut down since I got sick in March, possibly with Covid. I then lost my job of 23 years, my only source of income, two days before my 50th birthday. I had been working full time printing and retouching B&W photos (I am a master printer and retoucher) for artists, famous fashion photographers, museums, estates, some names you’ve heard of if you’re interested in photography…but that industry has become a shadow of what it once was and the Covid crisis ended my career abruptly. Now I have the opportunity to figure out if I can make a living reinventing myself as a professional perfumer and re-launching as an income-generating business. Necessity is the mother of invention, as they say.
This is a personal tragedy, to be sure, but it’s also a huge opportunity to follow my dreams, to finally get recognition for the work I’ve done over the past ten years finding my own way in creating fragrance. When I first began learning, I had never even really thought about perfumery or even the existence of someone called a “nose” or a perfumer. I’d always been extremely particular about smells but fine fragrance just wasn’t in my realm of experience. Suddenly I realized - at a time when I was in a rut with my art photography (which I’ve never shown since moving to nyc) - that it’s possible to make art that people really engage with in their daily lives, that many people want to buy, and that inevitably becomes woven into the fabric of their lives, their dreams, and memories. I realized that there is both a market and a huge audience for for indie and niche fragrance (even more so now) in a way that there just isn’t for contemporary photography. I was excited at the thought that if I got friends and artists I know wearing and loving my fragrances, my work would reach a wider audience simply by virtue of being worn. I had the idea, which turned out to be wrong, that I wouldn’t need to market myself if only I could make fragrances good enough. Plus I discovered that making excellent fragrances is actually really difficult, requires a lot of knowledge, creativity, and skill - not to mention hundreds and hundreds of raw materials - and that my background in chemistry and formulating photographic developers, toners, etc wasn’t as relevant as I’d hoped. I love a challenge and love learning, however, so I was hooked - obsessed even.
I conceived of Clandestine Laboratories as a brand in 2013 and the concept grew more distinct over time: a brand that is, like me, unknown, underground, secretive - I’ve got the good stuff and it comes in plain packages because it’s all about the juice. Possibly I could turn my shyness about promoting my work and my outsider status as a self-taught perfumer with no background with fragrance into an advantage, a “unique selling position” as it were. At the least, people who are my intended audience seem to “get” the brand concept. Fragrance is supposed to be a little naughty, a bit transgressive, forbidden, and Clandestine Laboratories embodies that. Fragrance that’s so enjoyable, so addictive, that’s a little dangerous and probably should be illegal.
We (I use the royal “we” to refer to the brand) will remain shut down for the near future and I hope to use this time figure out how to re-launch as a real business on a scale that will allow me to focus on this full-time. I can’t say this hasn’t been really difficult but I’m thankful to have a dream that I’m now forced to take more seriously. Sometimes it’s easier to make the leap if you’re pushed out of the plane. Let’s hope this parachute works.
If you’re reading this, I hope this is the beginning of a lasting relationship. I am truly excited to have the opportunity to connect with an audience beyond the small circle of artists and friends I’ve engaged with so far. Please sign up for the mailing list (if you closed the pop-up without doing so, there’s a tiny button on the home page next to the Insta button) so that we can stay in touch directly and share news about new fragrance launches (I have over 30 completed or near complete). If you’re on Instagram, please follow ClandestineLaboratories there for updates and photographs. And I’ll be posting my thoughts on fragrance and updating my story here, so please sign up for email alerts below if you’re interested in following along.
Most of all, please stay safe. This is a scary time but we’re going to get through it and come out stronger. Like a Phoenix from the ashes of the old, may we all be reborn to greater connection with each other, a healthier society, and a fresh appreciation of the preciousness of every living moment.
With love and hope,
Mark